Holy December, it's been a long time!

Well, I have been a mite busy lately with craft shows and such, but I have finally posted some new items to the shop.

I have all kinds of lovely magical ideas floating around in my head--ideas that involve fairyland details, studs, feathers, leather. . . now that the craft show push is over, hopefully I can start bringing these ideas to life! I'll also hopefully do better with updating my blog--I think I need to go in a more cohesive direction for the new year here. So many things to work on!

Toodle-ooo!

FRONT PAGE!! and handspun yarn plus a new item

Well, I've had my new shop on Etsy for a little over a year, and my dream of being featured on the Front Page finally came true! Of course, for once I wasn't online, and it was there yesterday afternoon. But I checked my Google Analytics report, and saw that I had more than 300 views yesterday--which I knew had to be because of a Front Page item! :) You can check out the archived treasury on CraftCult.

I also made yarn the other day that I used in a brand new item; in fact, I made it because I envisioned the perfect yarn for the project and it had to be done! I made the yarn on my drop spindle with roving from Portland Fiber Studio. I LOVE that place! I could spend so much money there. . .

Yarn:



Butterfly Maiden Scarf (made using the yarn on top in the above photo):



I'm going to see the Raveonettes is Boston on Tuesday too, so this is just an all-around great week or so! :)

I've been stalked!

I know this is my first update in probably MONTHS! Eeek! But this morning I just received notification that one of my shop items is being featured on etsystalker.com! How exciting!

In other news, Sage's lip repair was done on the first of the month, and he's healing really well--he's his smiley little bouncy self again!

I am starting a new crafting endeavor: spinning! I am armed with a new drop spindle, some gorgeous roving, raw wool, and locks--watch out! I'm sure you can guess that once I get the hang of this, I'll be wanting a wheel--it's the only thing on my Christmas list (besides Guitar Hero 5 and The Beatles Rock Band).

Oh, excitement! I also need to get my butt in gear for the holiday shopping season! I have one big unrelated project left to finish (around 17 photo albums, 3000+ photos for a client I found on Craigslist) and then I'll be crocheting like a madwoman! I also have some great accessory ideas after seeing the Yeah Yeah Yeahs at the Orpheum on Sept. 28th. Karen O's still is AMAZING.

That's all for now! I'll try to keep you posted!

New items, and I just bought 2 Main Showcase spots!

Yes, I totally babysat the Showcase Gateway on Etsy to buy two Main Showcase spots--one in a week, and one in two weeks! I figured I'd let myself get my stock up a bit before that. I've made a few new additions to my shop, and I'm working on more at the moment!

Take a peek at Frost to see my new items, including this one:



I've also got a great idea for a series of pieces--mostly necklaces, bracelets, and rings--inspired by the Yeah Yeah Yeahs most recent album It's Blitz. I'm in the "feeling the music/sketching ideas" phase right now, but there should be a few new things from that in the next week or so.

Shop Update: Just three items, but long overdue!

I have just added two sets of new crochet bangles I've just started making. This is the "Atlantic" set; the other is a bright aqua, red, and gold set. I also listed a cuff with a dichroic glass focal piece and some beading. To check out the new stuff, visit my shop!

I'm hoping for a productive week and some more new items added! I am bursting with ideas--it's just a matter of sitting down and working them out! I also have plans for some new stoneware pendants and other pieces. Stay tuned!

Rant: The "Ideal" Woman

This is from June 11th.

My mother told me today about a friend of my father's who was hanging out at the beach with them this past weekend who said of his wife (who I am sure was not present) "Oh, she's getting worn out. I've gotta trade her in for a new model." This couple is in their early forties. The wife is a youthful and active mother of a five year old boy and a three year old girl, both adorable.

What kind of culture is this where a comment like this, joking or whatever, goes unchastised? I tell you, if I had been there I would've had something to say. Like "Oh, and you're exactly the same guy she met in college? No extra pounds, no recession of the hairline? I guess this is the kind of appreciation women get for sacrificing their bodies to produce children with assholes like yourself."

Because honestly, how can a few hours of "bliss" with a perfect plastic body compare to the intimate complex history of relationship? What depth would you sacrifice for a fleeting moment of attractiveness that adheres to some prescribed notion of beauty that has nothing to do with the reality of the natural female body? And I mean "natural" as in "found in nature."

Think about the "ideal" American female appearance as presented in all types of media: bleach blond hair (how many women have hair that light in adulthood?); tan, hairless skin--and I mean hairless--women are supposed to think they shouldn't even have ARM HAIR anymore; miles of legs, small waist, high round butt, and large breasts that MUST be perky. How many women look like that as God made them?

And I'm not saying anything whiny like "This standard is unfair and impossible to live up to." I'm saying this standard is ridiculous and women SHOULDN'T want to live up to it. Why should anyone buy someone else's imagining of a "beautiful" body when every woman should be celebrating her own body, and all the things that make it unique, which is truly beautiful?

I was watching TV today and there was a young woman in her 20s debating whether or not she should get breast implants. She was an attractive girl with dark hair and a body that seemed to be in very good shape. Her breasts were probably on the smaller side of average, like an A. But her friends, who she worked with at Hooters, told her that buying breasts would make her feel feminine and confident, not to mention making her clothes fit better and her tips grow before her eyes-- almost as fast her cup size!

I think breast implants are totally unnecessary outside of a cancer patient wanting to replace a breast after a mastectomy. Wanting to feel like yourself is different than trying to become someone else. But the ridiculousness of breast implants is not my point here. The problem is thinking you can BUY something that will give you confidence. Placing the responsibility for your self worth on superficial things is nothing but a temporary patch-up. The novelty will wear off, you'll age, whatever is popular will change, whatever--then you are once again without self-confidence.

Rather than buying something that makes our outsides different, why not try evaluating the insides and figuring out why we feel the way we do about ourselves? You know why? Because buying something, even something that costs thousands of dollars, not to mention the obvious physical costs and hidden emotional costs, is easier than delving into our souls. We don't even know ourselves anymore. We just follow along, accept what is given to us, and don't question the norm or ask for more.

I mean, my mother was irritated by what that man said about his wife. But she didn't feel comfortable calling him out for his idiocy. We are polite about the wrong things. Sad. And all we do is run from real emotions into the easy ideals of a society that, even if it is artificial, backwards, and wrong, has clear expectations and a precise mold that you can chip yourself apart to fit into. Until they come out with a newer model.

Two for Tuesday: Things I'm Enjoying

Well, I have a couple of recommendations for you this fine morning. I have just finished my morning workout, and let me tell you--I have not enjoyed such a relaxing and inspiring one in a long time. The New York City Ballet workout is LOVELY. And easy enough that someone who admires ballet (but doesn't have a lick of dance training) can do it. I highly recommend it for a strength training workout that gets you really in touch with your body and needs no equipment, not even sneakers! Plus it makes me walk around with much nicer posture, and I feel more graceful in all my


Our Jostens Yearbook Rep Ryan came for a little cover meeting yesterday and brought us this lovely book (a copy each for my mother and me). It is such a cool project! I really think my friend, Ms. Cost would love it, if she hasn't seen it already. They're working on a Year of Evenings now. Click on the book cover to check out the blog where they post these photos!

Happy Tuesday!

Lip Adhesion: All Gains Erased

Sage's adhesion tore open last night, so we went through all of that for nothing. I called his plastic surgeon this morning and talked to her about the next step. We did know that there was a possibility of it tearing going into it, and Dr. White told us that if that happened, she would recommend another adhesion. When I spoke with her this morning, I told her that although Tom and I knew what her suggestion was, we felt that we'd prefer Sage to have as few procedures as possible, so we'd like to go ahead with the full repair next. The great thing she said was that when she was doing Sage's adhesion, she wished she was doing a complete repair, because there was actually a lot of give in the left side of his lip, so she would've felt comfortable doing the whole thing.

The adhesion is typically to bring the two portions of the lip closer together so the muscle and skin get stretched a bit--then it's not such a struggle stitching them together in the permanent repair. So after he heals up a bit, we're going to schedule the full repair!

My heart just sank this morning when I saw it, because I felt so sad that he'd gone through all that for seemingly nothing. But he's a resilient boy-- he was already smiling on Saturday and he's back to his happy self now.

Lip Adhesion Post-Op

Well, yesterday was quite the day. We got to the Maine Med Scarborough Surgery Center at 6:30 for Sage's lip adhesion. It's a nice-looking facility, actually. But I was just thinking about the fact that my baby boy was having SURGERY at 4 months old. Anyway, he was very cheery until about 7:00 because even though I woke him at five to give him some apple juice (clear liquids only 2 hours before surgery), he really didn't drink much. So he was a hungry little bear.

They took him for anesthesia at 7:15 and didn't let either of us go to see him off to sleep, which bothered me a bit. They told us with babies that young they don't have the parents come in, because it doesn't make much of a difference. That's ridiculous, because he notices the difference when I'm there or not there. I really think it's because they don't want to put in the oxygen tube in front of you (apparently babies that young can't breathe well unassisted when they're that deeply asleep). So we just wandered out of the pre-op area back to the waiting room and waited.

They have these screens that show the patients, coded with different colors that show what step of the procedure they're on. As soon as we saw Sage's showing that they were ready for us to come back there, we found someone to take us back, down a corridor and around corners and through some very soundproof doors. As soon as I heard my son screaming, they didn't need to tell me what recovery room he was in.

He was hoarse from the oxygen tube and the screaming. He also had these braces on his arms so he can't put his hands anywhere near his mouth. They basically don't allow him to bend his elbows at all. Also, someone had put one side on with the velcro toward his body, so his poor little cheek was red and scratched. The nurses were all acting really strange, like they didn't know why he was crying and couldn't figure out why he didn't stop immediately when I held him.

They said not to worry-- he was so numbed up he wasn't crying from pain. They know this how? Did he tell them? I've had my child get shots, and I know his "pain" cry. It's not like his hungry cry or his sleepy cry.

All that aside, when I sat down, they handed me a bottle of pedialyte with a regular nipple! When I said "I don't know if he's going to be able to work with that nipple" the nurse holding it out to me looked at me like I was crazy. Um, hello--can you not see what this child just had done? He has a cleft lip! He can't drink with a normal nipple!

Luckily I had brought both types of nipple he's used. One of them we stopped using because his suck was getting strong enough that it was just coming out too fast, he didn't know until too late that he was full, etc.

So anyway I'm sitting there holding my wriggly child who's screaming his head off, trying to hold his blanket on him (they didn't have him wrapped all that well) and also trying to communicate to my husband that I needed one of Sage's own bottles, giving directions through the . Once we got that sorted out, he really didn't like the pedialyte. I have no idea what it tastes like, but until Thursday he hadn't had anything but my milk and the occasional bottle of formula. I brought apple juice/water for him, and he liked that much better. He ate, spit up blood and apple juice, and then after about 30 minutes of me holding him and walking up and down the hall with him, he fell asleep. Then they told me they needed to take his IV out of his little hand. And basically 10 minutes later I was hauling him out the car in the rain.

The discharge instructions are not even 100 words of pertinent information. Nothing about cleaning around the stitches. And of course when they hand you the paper then ask if you have any questions, you're not thinking about when you get home. You're just thinking about the fact that your baby son is nearly inconsolable after a surgery.

On the way home, I said to Tom, "I wonder how they get those tubes in his ears." And he asked me if I was even sure they did them, because he never saw the ENT there. I didn't either, but his portion of the surgery was only about 10 minutes, so I figured he did his first then left. But I really have no idea. I sincerely hope they did that so he doesn't need to have another separate surgery. They mentioned it in the pre-op room, so I wouldn't think anyone forgot. . .

But now Sage has to wear those arm braces until his post-op appointment with the plastic surgeon, which is supposed to be in one week, but they couldn't fit us in until next Tuesday. So he has to wear them for more like a week and a half. It's all just so irritating. I really felt like we were just booted out yesterday. Plus, these people have paperwork on my son and still call him a "she". Same thing happened at all of his pre-op appointments. "How much does she weigh?" Fourteen pounds, ten ounces, and actually it's "he". One lady said "Really? Sage? Oh, that's interesting." Like, because she felt stupid, she wanted to make sure I did too. But I have never met a female Sage. I really think it's a unisex name. But whatthefuckever.

And of course when you go to an office, you inevitably need to present yourself to at least three people: the receptionist, the nurse/person that takes you to the office, and then the doctor/specialist/person you're actually there to see. It's one thing when people out in public think he's a girl (despite the fact that I always have him dressed VERY boyish (blue, green, orange, brown) and all his accoutrements are black or brown. It just gets pretty damn irritating when each one of the people is a doctor's office has access to paperwork that tells them exactly what sex the child is, if there was any doubt. Tom said he didn't think it was the name-- it's because Sage is such a pretty little boy. Does my husband know just what to say to me, or what? :)

Anyway, my sweet son who for about 1.5 months has been sleeping straight through the night, at least 10 hours, couldn't stay asleep in his little crib and periodically sobbed in his sleep while I held him. It can only get better from here. Until the next surgery (probably in September).

Well, I've probably complained enough. But I really hate how I feel like I can't question a doctor. Like for some reason we are expected to just do what they say because they obviously know what they're talking about. Well, I'm working my way out of that stupid assumption!

I have another rant on paper that I'll be presenting in the next day or so, and I have some items in the works for the shop, so hopefully I'll be taking photos today (good day for it, up here in the great Northeast). Tom's taking a test as part of the application process for an apprenticeship at the Navy Yard. Hopefully that's going well!

Where have I been?

Well, it's been quite a while since I posted, and we're getting geared up for Sage's first surgery on Friday. He's having a lip adhesion and tubes put in his ears. It's an outpatient procedure that will only take about an hour and a half. I don't really know how I feel-- I mean, I really hope that everything will be okay, with the anesthesia especially. But how many times has this surgery been done? Thousands and thousands. I feel kinda Zen about it. Let's hope I still do in the morning on Friday! It will probably be too early for me to think anything. He has to be there at 6:30 AM in Scarborough.

And meanwhile, my brother is getting rolled back to the next Navy SEAL class because he has to have laser surgery. But he's been in Illinois waiting to go to Coronado for what-- a month and a half now?-- and they couldn't do that before now? Eh, don't even get me started on that.

During all this as well, I'm trying to get my eating habits back in order, and exercise too. And I'm hoping next week to really get back to creating for the shop. So that's me-- how about you?

LIttle Miss Green Apple

I've been trying to prepare for my gift guides showcase spot tomorrow by adding some new headbands and hair items. I'm not sure what the results will be; I'm hoping it will at least give my shop some more exposure. I'm really trying to promote, but I don't know how to get more people to read my blog, check out my shop, etc. I've just kept adding things here and there, and checked out the forums for some suggestions and critiques of what I can improve. I'm just going to keep going, making pretty things, and having faith!

Happy Sage = Happy Mumma

Is that not an adorable baby? I mean, I may be a bit biased, but I'm pretty sure I haven't seen a cuter one ever! :) Sage has been giving us happy smiles and joyful laughs every day now for about two weeks! He'll be 3 months old in about a week and a half, and he just slept all night on Friday night! Went to sleep at 8, woke up at 5. He's such a good boy.

He eats like a ravenous little beastie. But he's getting toward an adult food schedule-- a lot fewer times a day, but around 6 or 7 ozs. every time. He hasn't been weighed since the beginning of the month, but I'm sure he's up around 13.5-14 pounds!

That's my little Sage update-- I should have another kind of update in a day or so! New products, if I can get them done in time. I bought a showcase spot for Wednesday, so I want to make sure to have plenty of warm-weather accessories in there.

Felting Fool

That's what I've been lately! I finally got the hang of wet felting, and I've done it every day for the past three! I don't know that I'll ever bother to completely needle felt anything again! It's so time-consuming. I've posted four brand new items today on my shop, and I'm really pleased with everything about them! Even the photographs. Here's one for you:



That's what I call the "Firebreather Ring"; it's of course wet felted then stitched then beaded. I hope to add quite a few more of those to the shop soon. I've also made some lovely headbands with flowers, which I've been wanting to make for a long time. There is a dark teal snood with accompanying flower in the works; look for that in the next day or so. I love snoods, and I want to bring them back. I crocheted a lovely brown one for myself a few years ago, and people always commented on it.

That's what's new in the fashion wonderland. . . Planning on lots of new exciting and visually delicious products in my near future.

Oh, and on the poetry front, I've entered a few poetry contests and sent some in to journals that don't pay. I'll of course let you know!

The Cuteness and Adobe Adventures

So I was finally able to install my Adobe Create Suite2 on Tom's computer. As you may know, I am now 2 versions behind the most recent, and I've had this software for a WHILE. But my computer did not have enough memory to install and run it. I am going to try to teach myself all the fun stuff I can. I think Photoshop is really going to help with the photos for my shop.

Speaking of which, I got my hands on some deliciously lovely roving at Portland Fiber Gallery and Weaving Studio, which I had the good fortune to visit on Friday. I'll be doing some new felted projects soon, and my brother's girlfriend has agreed to model for me. I'm really excited about that, because I plan on working on some new jewelry and hair accessories, and those are so much easier to photograph on someone else. I should have an update ready for Sunday, I hope. I'll keep you posted!

Monday Monday

So I have been a ghost lately, when it comes to my internet presence. This is because of a little thing called a yearbook deadline, which is today but we got an extension till Wednesday. I have been layout-ing and editing and photo-placing till I can't see straight! But yesterday we took a break from all that to go the beach, and it was a beautiful day indeed. My parents, Tom, Sage, and I all went down to York to enjoy the sunshine. This is Tom on the porch:



And I also took a few pics of Sage yesterday too, in the first non-newborn size clothing he's been able to wear! We went to his doctor on Thursday and he weighed 9 lbs. 10 ozs! Plus he grew about 2 inches. That means in the last 3 weeks he gained almost 3 pounds! He's a little porker. And he's finally getting baby chub-- fat little cheeks, rolls on his legs, and little round belly! I love it!





His weight gain means that when we go see the plastic surgeon at the end of the month, they'll probably schedule his surgery then and there (he has to be 10 pounds before they'll operate, and the rate he's gaining, he'll easily be there in another 2 weeks).

Not only have I not had time for blogging, I haven't had time for creating! And that's a sad thing indeed. I have some ideas for some new shop additions, and I'm hoping once this yearbook is done, I'll have some time for that.

Some Makeup Fun For Me

Last night while I was waiting for Tom to come home I decided to do my makeup and hair to surprise him (instead of being in pajamas and a ponytail, as I often am lately). I really liked how it came out, so I snapped some pictures of it.



When all you seem to do is pump breast milk, feed it to the baby, and change him, you need a little something to feel sexy every once in a while! Oh, and it had the desired effect on Tom too-- the first thing he said to me when he walked in was "You're beauuutiful!" :) Made my day!

What I Saw this Morning

How sweet and adorable is that? I have to say, there is nothing more visually stimulating than a sexy man and a lovely little baby. I can see why guys would use a baby to pick up chicks! :) I'm kidding-- but seriously, my heart just melted when I saw them like that.

A song and some photos

I saw this video on VH1 the other day, and I was pleasantly surprised to see something that was original, unusual, and charming, rather than the standard half-naked women and cars, like in the hip-hop videos that get so much airtime. So I wanted to share it with you! :) Something about it reminds me of The Science of Sleep; probably the rustic feel of the fabric items, and the surreal setting and movements.

And of course, there will be photos of Sage in this post! We went to the doctor today, and since we were discharged on the 11th, he has gained almost a pound! He's up over his birth weight now-- 6 lbs. 13 ozs! Lately we've been laying him in front of the wood stove for an hour or two in the morning, naked so his bum can air out and he can move all around! Today, he kind of fell prey to the incredible warmth there.


And this is him looking a little more modest. For the longest time, he kept his little breech legs bent right up by his body, but now he stretches out a bit more, as you can see here!


I'm sure we'll continue to think that everything he does is adorable and must be digitally captured. I never cared before about having a video camera; now I really want one!

Bath Time with the Bean

As you can probably tell, he's not nuts about the whole bathing thing! :) But he looks so cute after we dry him off-- his hair fluffs up like a little baby chicken's! But while his teeny body is all wet and he's howling, he seems so bitty and vulnerable.

You know, I'm home all day and it seems like I should be able to get all kinds of things done-- I mean, he sleeps 3-4 hrs at a time, and it only takes him about 15 minutes to eat-- but it seems like all I have time for is taking care of him. The time just vaporizes or something. Because of course I have to pump every 2 hrs, and he needs to be changed and all that good stuff. But I have a wonderful time with him, and I think eventually everything will get to be a little smoother and quicker. Ta-ta from Mummaland!

This is our little sweetie!

Here's our Sage having some dinner with Daddy! We're finally home and happy to be here, but I haven't gotten a ton of sleep. Not that I expect to get much for the next 10 or so years. Probably even longer, because my mother still wakes up worried about my brother. I guess once you have kids, it never ends!

I'm sure I'll have more pictures in the near future. We have been trying to take pictures of all the little things, even his first bath at home tonight. He didn't love that, that's for sure! :) But we're all happy and healthy here-- just a little more tired than usual!

Still in the hospital

So Sage had a little spell where his heart rate and oxygen levels dropped around 2AM on Saturday when they tried to give him his car seat test. After that happened, they kept him in the nursery on a monitor all day. Around 9 that night he passed a second car seat test, and he was back in our room, with the expectation that we would be going home on Sunday morning (the pediatrician on that day had said that if he was good on the monitor all day and passed the test at night, that was a reasonable expectation). So here it is Monday, and we're still here. Why? Because a different pediatrician that was on yesterday just decided that he was keeping Sage here IN THE NURSERY ON THE MONITOR until Wednesday. And now I don't even have a room (I was discharged on Saturday night), so I'm just hanging out in the nursery with all my belongings on a cart, not even sure when or whether I will have a bed tonight. Tom and I are pretty frustrated with the whole situation, and kind of getting to the point where we want to sign him out "against medical advice." So that's where things are. . . That's all I can really say right now.

Early

I am a Mumma! All of a sudden! Our little boy was born at 5 AM on Wednesday, the 4th. He was 36 weeks; about a month early according to our due date, but he is still a nice healthy boy at 6 lbs 8 ozs! I'll give the quick and dirty details: Just a little before 2 AM my water broke while I was sleeping. My contractions were about 4 or 5 minutes apart at that time. We were at the hospital by 2:30, where they determined that I was dilated to 4cm. They checked Sage's position with an ultrasound and he was breech. By 3:30 they had determined that I would be having a C-section. I was in the OR by 4:30, they scrubbed me up, gave me the epidural, and brought Tom in just before 5 AM. By 5:06 we had our little Sage Cameron! He is the most precious thing. Daddy is in love too, and can't seem to get enough of holding our little honey! Despite being early and having his cleft lip/palate to contend with, Sage has been great at feeding, and we're hoping to go home this weekend.

I'll post some photos when I finally get home!

Me= Ridiculously Bad at Posting Lately

I think that even though I normally consider myself a pretty good multi-tasker, it seems that one thing always falls behind when I take up another. Or it could be that I have more than just a few things going on lately.

For example: I have been awesome at posting new items on my shop lately. But my poetry has fallen WAY behind. However, I have gotten a poem published in a journal created by some media students at USM, so that is pretty exciting. The weirdest thing is that I didn't even realize they had chosen a piece of mine until the other day when I googled myself! Yes, I am guilty of googling myself periodically, just to see what comes up. But my name and poem title were on their table of contents! So I was pretty excited about that.

As you can clearly see, I have been horrible at updating the blog. Just awful. I mean, no posts since Dec. 18th? That's just pathetic. But I have returned, and hopefully I will be better in the future. Though I don't know how much extra time I'll have when I begin breastfeeding 9-12 times a day. SERIOUSLY. I just found out that that is how many times a day Sage will need to eat. And then all the corresponding diaper changes. . . I'm kind of wondering if I'll be doing anything else at all once he's here! And his due date is just 30 short days around the corner, if he comes when expected. Am I prepared? I have NO IDEA.